by Isabella Weigand ’22
This week heralds the arrival of your new favorite sporting event. Jam-packed with action, drama, and a valuable opportunity to learn more about vegetables, this epic tournament will blow your house slipperys right off your quarantined feet! Prepare yourselves for the one and only… Potatolympics.
The Potatolympics will consist of three rounds, as follows:
Round 1: Only the Starchiest Shall Prevail
We will begin with eight hopeful contestants, who will be judged on usefulness of texture (determined by solids and starch content). Only four will move on to the next round.
Round 2: If I Can Grow It, Anyone Can
Now down to four brave contestants, who will be judged on convenience of growth and crop yield. Two will face elimination.
Round 3: The Potato to Rule Them All
Two steadfast contestants remain, who will be judged on overall coolness.
The winner will be the very first Potatolympian, and will be dubbed Most Spudtacular, and will receive its very own blog post. There is truly no greater prize.
Keep your eyes peeled for Round 1! The Potatolympics has officially begun. May the spuds be ever in your favor.